The public eye has glanced upon the sport of dogfighting and the sensationalism of a true fooball hero fallen. Michael Vick, who posted five mediocre seasons with the Atlanta Falcons, will soon be launching the first Cockroachfighting competition in a federal prison near you.
This could not have come at a worse time for the bloodsport. Kennels nationwide are scrambling as the media continues to spotlight this legitimate albiet illegal american pastime. Eddie Centers, owner of Dog Eat Dog Kennels, was forced to sell his stake before it bit him in the ass in form of a federal indictment.
"I don't know what this country is coming to", says Centers, "when you can't even fight a dog to near-death for the pleasure and enjoyment of sport". Centers adds that he, like Vick, had an investment "soley for the purpose of entertaining friends and a means to loan money as lavish gifts for gambling". He claims it's urban legend that dogfighting and gambling go hand in hand. Asked if he ever gambled on dogfighting, Centers responded, "Are you freaking nuts? I'd have to be an idiot to admit that to a blogger. I'm still under investigation, you know".
Gambling in sports has always been a sensitive subject, made popular by the case of Pete Rose, the monster who brought baseball to the pinnacle of shame. Is there no worse crime than one who bets on his own sport? Obviously not, for Rose was bound to be inducted into the Baseball Hall Of Fame but instead was banned for life from the sport for his lifestyle. By comparison, Michael Vick was merely suspended indefinatly, leaving the door open to a future in the Nation Football League after he serves an undetermined sentence in a yet to be determined butt-rape prison. This sends a clear message: Fighting puppies to death is not all that bad.
Owners of prize fighting dogs love their beasts very much, and is evident by the way they treat them. "I love my dog with a baseball bat", says Billy Bob Crotchton of New Orleans. "It shows, because she gets that special look in her eye when I break bones". Others dish out a little lovin' by strapping a female in a rape stand, like the one found on Vicks property. Perfectly fitting for a Bitch.
Recent national attention has a lockjaw on the sport and District Attorneys are chasing their tails with a taste for blood. They are clearly on the wrong path.
There is a deeper underlying secret, one that the American Dogfighting Assosiation does not want you to know, something so dark that even respectable law-abiding gambler's eveywhere are wondering whether they can come to terms with this development.
Doggie-Doping. That's right, you heard it here first, folks, the first of a series of special reports focusing on the use of performance-enhancing drugs used in dogfighting.
How would you feel if you wagered your daughters entire college fund on a favorite in the fifth with 4-1 odds, only to lose it to a shabby, weak looking Parson Russell Terrier who resembles nothing more than a bait dog?
Execution of ill-performing dogs has been a focal point in the Michael Vick case. Sadly, this is misinformation. The fact is, these dogs actually won said fights. But after conclusive results by the FIFA, the sanctioning body of the anti-doping arm of Dogfighting, it was determined in each case that the animal had been in violation of league doping policies and must be put down via shotgun. This creates precedence and should be a hallmark of future penalties in other sports, such as Tour de France. What bicyclist would chance a prohibited blood transfusion faced with death penalty? Denmark cyclist Michael Rasmussen would likely be a little more forthcoming with information, one would think.
As one can clearly see, organizers of dogfighting are in fact in their right mind, contrary to popular belief. "The integrity of the sport is in jeapordy", says one source, who declined to be named for this story because he, too, is under federal investigation. "It's completely unethical, and cuts to the very heart of the bond between the fight and the wager. How can a bookie justify breaking the legs of a client who had a sure bet"?
This debacle also raises questions about inductions into the Dogfighting Hall Of Fame, as well as career statistics and record holders. Who is to say that Rover is the true World Champion of all time if it was discovered in his last fight that he tested positive for souped-up Puppy Chow? How can a purebreed look himself in the mirror and say he he had not damaged the integrity of the sport? How can an American Pitbull Terrier sleep at night without kicking in throes of a doggie dream?
These are of course rhetorical questions, and we may never know the answers, because dogs can't talk.
What this sport needs most is a new sponsor, one to replace the leadership role that was lost with the conviction of Michael Vick. Someone with stature and loads of NFL money.
This writer suggests the perfect canidate. Would the real Terrell Owens please step forward and slap down some duckets.
Sure, we can keep a secret.
[As published by Greg Brunty 2007 www.MySpace.com/gregbrunty]